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"How do you feel?" was the question asked by the acupuncturists that a friend took me to in the late nineties.
My puzzled expression probably inspired him to ask the same question again: "How do you feel? “. To be honest, the repeated question made me even more confused ... "how do I feel? “, I repeated to myself many times. But I couldn’t get the answer. Long silence between two persons, one who expects a response and the other who is totally confused, brought in a lot of discomfort. So, in order to break the silence and anticipation, I finally asked for clarification: „What do you think by ‘how do I feel’? “. "How do you feel means just that, how do you feel?" he explained, but unfortunately, still not reaching my awareness of feelings. "Are you sad, anxious, angry ...?" Despite these examples, I couldn’t still recognize my dominant feeling.
This meeting has started my journey into the depths of feelings, blocks that I was holding inside for years, not even being aware, along with the depths of the unconscious in the region of the second chakra.
As my personal story illustrates, entering the field of the second chakra, we enter into the emotional aspect of our personality and energy field. Unlike the first level of the field (the first chakra is the entrance into it) which is structural and represented by lines of light, the second level of the field is fluid. Liquid outlines in different colors reflect our emotional body and the emotional state in which we find ourselves at a particular moment. Using extrasensory perception, one can observe here disruptions of energy flow, roundabout flow of energy, bright, vibrant colors, or dark "clouds" of stagnant energy. At this level of the aura, the chakras have well known colors: first chakra is red, the second - orange, the third- yellow, the fourth-pinkish green, the fifth - sky blue, the sixth-indigo blue and the seventh - whitish-golden.
The second chakra is located in the pelvic region, in the area of the pubic bone in the front and rear side of the body and it supplies with energy the organs that are anatomically situated there: uterus, ovaries, prostate, bladder, hips and the lumbar spine. It also rules the immune system. Any physical problems in this part of the body indicate the difficulty for the emotions to move freely.
What does that mean? Each emotion (e – motion=movement) indicates movement that gradually reaches its climax and then declines, either continuing its progress or disappearing. In case of trauma, physical and emotional pain, a contraction of the system and constriction of the energy takes place in order to stop the pain, thus seemingly eliminating it or, better to say, numbing it so we don’t have to feel it.
Unfortunately, this strategy doesn’t bring lasting results. It may provide us a temporary relief, but in the long run it leads to building blocks and stagnant energy, which in turn, leads to a diminishing presence of feelings in our consciousness. Feelings simply grow numb and sink into unconsciousness. That is why it is said that the second chakra leads into the depths, not only because it is ruled by the element of water, which is simply impossible to bring to a full stillness, but also because the feelings and their depth lead to the depths of the soul and to the transpersonal work (often directing to past lives, for example).
This chakra requires change and release. Equally to water which we can’t make still and bring under control and structure, the feelings and their flow can’t be permanently under control neither brought to the status quo. Our ability to adapt to the changes that river of life brings to us, reflects the functionality of the second chakra.
Movement stimulates pleasure and further on, satisfaction calls our attention toward our senses and so we live in the present moment. One of the main characteristics of the second chakra is pleasure and sexuality. Sexuality itself is the ultimate expression of many qualities of the second chakra: movement, sensations, desires, emotions, polarity.
When we are deprived from primary pleasure, the secondary pleasures take its place and often develop into addictions (addiction to food, drugs, alcohol, sex, etc.).
In the absence of energy in the second chakra, rigidity of the body and the psyche appear along with underdeveloped social skills, denial of pleasure, fear of sex, fear of change, lack of desire and excitement in life.
Too much energy in this chakra is reflected in sexual dependence, addiction to pleasure, extreme emotions (hysteria), manipulative seduction and obsessive attachment.
Physical problems can be manifested in form of menstrual disorders, pain in the knees and lower back, reproductive and urinary systems diseases, weak immune system, as well as frigidity and impotence.
The second chakra is also the place where we meet and create a relationship with ourselves. It's a place that keeps the answer to the question: How do I feel with myself? Do I consider myself worthy of attention, love and pleasure or do I feel small and insignificant?
By these questions we are slowly introduced to the territory of the oral character structure (also known as the abandoned child). This defense mechanism can be developed in the period from six months to two years of age. It occurs as a result of lack of attention and care, support and validation. Somehow, caregivers are "not aware" of the child, i.e. they are not aware of his needs and therefore don’t meet those needs (also in times of famine, war and the like, they are simply not able to). To the child, that creates a feeling of not being loved nor desired, that it isn’t worthy and that its existence doesn’t make any difference to the world around him. It often happens that one of the oral child’s parents is absent, either because of a job, divorce or illness.
Oral character was trying to make clear to his environment that he needed something, but the environment has never reacted or it, or it reacted with a delay. This is not about the ideal parent who is seated next to his child 24 hours a day; it is about a chronic failure to meet certain needs of the child, whether it is about physical needs such as food, water, diapers changing or lack of contact, presence and love.
When a child needs something, it communicates it to its environment by his behavior or sounds (speech skills are not yet developed at this early stage). If no one in the vicinity responds, the child begins to cry and sometimes gets into a tantrum. If even that doesn’t help, and it is quite natural that it can’t remain forever in this place, a child is slowly calming down. But, at what cost?
Because of the excessive tension that arises from the need on the one hand and emptiness on the other (there is no one to take care of our needs), that very young mind gets to the conclusion that it is not good to have a need. And at this point we begin to give up on our selves, our life and on our needs.
If such situations are repeated over and over again, the individual who is decreasingly in touch with her feelings and needs is formed. For the oral character person, the needs are something that will always bring the trouble, and trouble is to be avoided at all costs. And so, a part of us, which is "in need" gradually alienates from its own core. We learn to live without our needs, without seeking help and support from anyone ("I can do everything by myself"), because if we dare to ask, we can potentially face the emptiness inside and outside of us, and that is devastating.
"So I will not ask for anything," is the oral character’s decision, while the largest and, most often, unaware craving for such a person is to get support and contact, particularly in the place of need.
In order to heal her wound, the oral character must get in touch with her needs and feelings and must come to feel anger (since no one was there when she just needed it the most), emptiness and sadness. More sadness is hidden in the fragile and frightened heart of the oral person, as well as the lack of confidence that someone would, perhaps, just this one time, stay with her after she expressed her need. With this defense mechanism, we are caught between despair of unfilled emptiness on the one side, and fear of exposure and potential repeated abandonment on the other.
This character structure has a difficulty to open for receiving, so that in addition to the problems in the area of the second chakra, the problem can occur in the region of the fifth chakra (difficulty in communication, in expressing needs, in acceptance. As a result, it may also show in physical symptoms, like thyroid problems, etc.).
Self confidence is a major problem in oral character and out of her own insecurity and lack of confidence in the area of her needs, a collapse occurs. We cannot support our own life as no one has shown us how, while we were growing up. Torso of the oral person reflects that by its bent body posture.
This character structure often doesn’t understand abundance because she grew up in the atmosphere of "not enough." She deeply believes that she is not enough, that the way she is, isn’t good and worth enough to have someone really accept and love her, and that's why she has to earn it. Therefore, she naturally switches to the role of the one who cares about the needs of others and often devotes her life to meeting the needs of her family members, friends, etc.
People with this structure are natural teachers because they are interested in many things and have the ability to share what they know with love. They can make good use of their intelligence in the field of science and art.
And finally, I want to remind you that studying the character structures we have the opportunity to develop a better understanding and compassion for our own internal struggles, as well as for the struggles of the people around us, whether they are family members, colleagues, friends or people in therapy. The aim is to get to know everything that is not, in order to get to what is, to the core and essential goodness in every living being.
Good luck in diving into the mysterious and limitless depths of your humanity and your soul.
BS Brennan Healing Science