Maja Medić, Sensa
Date of issue:
-Death as one of the most powerful awakenings in life-
The search for meaning and deep assurance that there must be something more to life than just what we encounter in our everyday routine, a lot of deep work on herself (for about twenty years), enabled her today to suc-cessfully help others on this path.
"There was this release of the life force," says Katarina about her awakening (post surgery). "Then the energy began to move more freely and with vigor inside me, daily insights were emerging and at one point I felt the need to make it “official" in some way.
This need led me to the Barbara Brennan School of Healing. I had no intention of being a therapist, I just wanted to deal with my own problems. As the things were changing in my life, on a practical level and as I was „unraveling myself”, a natural desire to share that experience with others appeared. It was not enough to recount to someone my experience of transformation: I now wished that other people feel and experience how this process is powerful and tranformative, especially when it comes to the integration of awareness of the spirit and matter. A human being then becomes a bridge between the two worlds. Such a state of consciousness gives me a sense of purpose, something that is worth living. "
Katarina Subotich is a graduate of the Barbara Brennan School of Healing and is currently completing her studies of PsychoEnergetics in Spain. She lives on the two sides of the world - more in Puerto Rico, less in Serbia, but quite enough to share with us her experience and knowledge through individual sessions and workshops she conducts with the help of Atila Schroeder.
“During most most of my life, death has been one of the most powerful awakenings. My grandmother with whom I grew up died when I was 14 years old. It was a period of overnight maturation. From that moment I began to wonder how life, with the final act such as death, could make sense. In fact, it didn’t make sense to me... At this, teenage stage, a lot of things weren’t clear to me, and I had a need and a strong urge to untangle one of the greatest mysteries of human existence, death, and therefore, also - life. There were many difficulties on the way, both internal and external. Most often these internal difficulties were coming from unconscious patterns, defenses and beliefs.
Not understanding why things happen the way they happened (while I wanted something completely opposite of what was happening in reality) I started looking for answers within myself. Among various books in which I sought an-swers, the wisdom of the ancient East appealed to me the most. That way of thinking and understanding the world, life and death, was uniting philosophy and religion. That is why I am glad that I didn’t grow up in some imposed system of beliefs that was coming from my family: I truly started to look for my way. "
After high school, Katarina moved to Bhakti yoga ashram where she has spent the following decade in search for answers, moving from place to place: Belgrade, Canada, America, Puerto Rico, India, Belgrade, Greece, America ... " At that moment, being at one place seemed scary and represented a synonym of "being stuck", but a serious health crisis has changed all that. "A culmination of all these internal conflicts and "clogged energies," got manifested at the physical level as a brain tumor - acoustic neuroma, which was removed by surgery when Katarina was 28. The negative side of this was the loss of hearing in one ear, but the positive has opened a whole new world.
After surgery, Katarina moved permanently to Puerto Rico because, “over there you can just be" she says. Then, four years ago, the illness of a close person made her return temporarily to Belgrade, where a few people got in touch with her after finding information about her on the Barbara Brennan School website and then everything started organically, first with individual treatments. She continued coming back every spring. At about same time, she went on to study PsychoEnergetics, which is body oriented approach to transformation of human consciousness. It was the experience from which the idea for the workshops has emerged.
"When we worked on the theme of the first chakra at the PsychoEnergetics training, we had an experiential exercise of birth. From such a deep experi-ence that has profoundly impacted my life, once again a strong desire arose to share this knowledge with others.
Thus the idea to create the first chakra workshop was born. The attendance was numerous, so instead of one, we made three workshops on the same topic. At the last workshop in the series, one of the participants asked, "Will there be workshops on the topic of the other chakras, or is this the only one?" And you already know the rest of the story: series of workshops on the chakras and character structures were naturally created. "
How did the collaboration with Atila Schroeder and Pathwork start?
"Besides the fact that we are dealing with similar matters, we also share similar views about the world and unselfish way of working. I think the latter is the most important reason. Often, we do not care how much we work and how we share the responsibility for what is to be done. When you have two persons, or a group of people who have the same or similar goal and are self-lessly engaged, because they want to do so, then this cooperation happens on another level ... Actually in another dimension. "
What is "better"- individual work or workshops?
"It all depends on the individual needs and on the place a person finds himself at a given moment. My work is not based on the fact that I “relocate "people where they want to be (skipping the present moment), or where I think they should be. We start from what is here and now. Often people first come to the individual treatment because they need to get to know me, to gain confidence. Things that emerge from the interior are often intimate and vulnerable, so that we could not even imagine expressing them in front of several persons. Thus, through a gradual work on oneself, a person gains more of own self and gets ready to set off into the wider waters of the group work.
While, again, for some people, coming to the workshop, directly into the group work, represents the starting point. Everything is extremely individual.
When people ask how long it takes to work on oneself, what do you tell them?
"If it is a physical problem or disease, the continuity is necessary and Barbara Brennan used to say: "Give me about six sessions so that I can do my best. “ When it comes to emotional process, it will again depend on the person. At the end, our consciousness and our being are unlimited, so this is a process and work without an end. Sometimes people arrive with some specific goal and need, and when they get what they wanted, they cease with this work and go on their way. And that’s okay. The work they have done and experienced have helped them to realize their essence and fulfill life purpose. It all depends with what intention, motive and need people come. "
How to motivate or find the approach to people who are afraid to enter the process, but would like to do so?
"The approach consists in understanding and compassion. So often in this work you see yourself in other people and you say to yourself: „I was like this," and quite likely I still am, to some extent. But, from the place of our own experience we begin to have more understanding for others. We recognize this place of suffering, pain, joy, sadness or guilt, so we can not judge and criticize, but just be present with what is. When people meet somebody like that, then they begin to wonder, they become curious and slowly open to contact. You should always be with a person where he or she is at the moment. If the impulse to step into the personal process doesn’t come or-ganically, then this kind of work can’t truly function. "
What is the ultimate goal of the work on oneself? Is it happiness?
"That's an interesting question. For me, personally, happiness itself, has never been a goal. Often people come to treatment to make their lives easier, to be more content, or in order to create fulfilling relationships, successful career, etc. It is quite a valid reason. But to me, it has never been enough. I often aimed at finding my purpose of existence and what gives meaning to life. This intention has led me to connect our human nature with spiritual spheres, expansion of consciousness and finding the eternal in the temporary. This is what makes sense to me. I trust it’s very different for each one of us. And when I think about it, the very process of discovering life and its purpose is a mystery that each of us should discover for ourselves. The purpose can change during lifetime. At this moment, this work gives me meaning. Human consciousness. It’s not my task to transform the consciousness of others and to change them, but to meet the consciousness in other people. In this way, I'm just an assistant to others on their journey of discovering themselves. "
What is your motivation for working with people?
"I have a feeling like I am giving and receiving from people something eternal; something that stays with one wherever he goes or wherever one believes that he will go after death. Something that is permanent.
It is necessary to satisfy the mind and to understand how and why things happen in a certain way. The purpose of understanding is to descend to the level of feelings. Knowledge has its place, but it is only one part of the whole. The entire process of finding and discovering yourself is something that is being experienced, and it's really an honor to be with people in such intimate places. That moment of presence ... It remains forever. Like the experience of the eternal in the temporary. "
If you were someone else and were supposed to describe Katarina, what would you say?
"A person who is honest and simple. An ordinary human being who follows the process of the person, right where he or she is, within themselves, within society and the family, in relation to others ... Being with the person, just the way he is. My intention is to meet people where they are - not in the place where they want to be or what they would like to change, but meeting people in the truth of the present moment. "